


Perspective

by blackjacktheboss



Series: Maskless [2]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-08-06 07:36:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16383938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackjacktheboss/pseuds/blackjacktheboss
Summary: If you haven't read Maskless, this one might not make sense so go check that one out first.I'm horrible at summaries but Percy is In A Place and trying to figure his shit out... aren't we all.





	Perspective

The sound of swords clanging is one that Percy feels in his bones. It is a sound that has become as comfortable to his ears as the crashing of waves. He paces slowly around the training pavilion, watching as Letha and another camper go head to head. In three months of private lessons, Letha has become one of the best swordsmen at Camp Half Blood. Percy isn’t sure if he can attribute that fact to his teaching, but the correlation puts a smile on his face. The other camper decides to take a step in towards Letha, and before Percy can call out his instructions, her weight has already shifted to her left, and she trips her opponent, smiling wide as their sword hits the ground.

“Very well done, Letha,” Percy calls as he claps. “And good instincts, Mikey. Next week we can go over tactics when you’re rushing an opponent, okay?”

Mikey nods and leaves the arena looking dejected. _I’ll find him later to give him some pointers,_ Percy thinks.

As Mikey fades from view, Letha looks at Percy expectantly. “How’d I do?”

Percy can’t help but smile. “Same as always, Letha. You did great.”

The young girl beams, bouncing with excitement. “Couldn’t do it without you, coach.”

“But you know what you can do without me?”

Letha rolls her eyes. “Clean up the arena.”

“I guess what they say about you Athena kids being smart is true after all,” he says with a playful wink.

Percy turns back towards the bleachers to retrieve his water bottle, and stops in his tracks.

“Hey Percy,” says a familiar voice.

“Piper McLean,” he says. “What are you doing here?”

She climbs down from the stands, and walks towards Percy. “Great to see you too, old friend.”

“Sorry,” he says with a soft laugh. “I’m just surprised is all. You hardly make it out here from your California oasis these days.”

Piper places her hands in her back pockets. “I know, I’ve been really bad about visiting. I’m sorry for that.”

Percy shrugs. “It’s okay, I get it.”

They stand awkwardly for a few heartbeats before Percy decides to charge headfirst into… whatever this is.

“So, what’s up?”

“Oh, well,” Piper said. “Um, I was hoping we could maybe… go somewhere to talk.”

“Jason okay?”

“He’s great, yeah. No, this is about… well, _her_.”

The way Piper says “her” sends a shiver down Percy’s spine but he nods and tries to steady himself. “Okay, sure.”

He lets Letha go for the day and walks with Piper towards the Big House. As they sit on the porch overlooking camp, a daughter of Demeter appears from the house with two glasses of lemonade.

“Thanks, Honey,” Percy says.

The girl smiles and disappears back inside without a word.

“Honey?” Piper asks.

“Her dad’s a beekeeper,” he says earnestly.

Piper smiles. “Of course.”

They each take a few sips of their lemonade, avoiding eye contact and looking out over the strawberry fields.

“So,” Percy says. “You wanted to talk about Annabeth.”

Piper taps her fingernails on the table nervously. “Yeah, I… she doesn't know I’m here.”

“I figured as much.”

“You know I love you both, right? I mean, I know it’s been a long time since we’ve been close but I care about you.”

“I know, Piper.”

“Good,” she says, exhaling. Percy’s words seem to give her the conviction to say what she had come to say. “I know things have been complicated between you and Annabeth for a long time, and I won’t sit here and pretend like I know the ins and out of your relationship but— I just don’t know how much longer Annabeth can do this with you, Percy.”

Percy can’t find words. His throat dries up and he wonders if Piper can hear his heart stampeding in his chest.

“She’s put her life on hold for you, just waiting around, hoping that you’ll work through your shit so you two can finally have a real life together. And the worst part is, I don’t even think she realizes she’s waiting for you. But she is, she’s waiting for you, and it’s breaking her heart. ”  

Percy’s eyes stay fixed on a bead of water that rests on the lip of his glass. _She’s waiting for you._

Suddenly, the bead begins to descend down the side of the glass, Percy’s eyes never leaving it its whole journey down. _Breaking her heart._

“What do you want me to do?” It comes out harsher than he means it to.

He can feel Piper staring back at him for a moment before looking down at her own glass. “I just… I want you to consider that maybe the best thing you can do for Annabeth is... let her go.”

Still, words elude Percy’s grasp. All at once Piper is confirming Percy’s worst fears and igniting an anger that he has kept buried for a long time.

He knows things aren’t perfect between him and Annabeth, but the nights when he’s in her bed are the nights he has felt most like himself, closest to the man he really wants to be. He has always thought those nights had done the same for her. But if Piper’s words are true, and those nights have come at the cost of Annabeth’s peace and happiness…. that is one casualty he can never accept.

Over the past few years, Percy has thought himself a coward countless times. It is a word he tortures himself with, using it to cut away at parts of himself that he’s ashamed of and wants to hide. He knows he’s a coward because of how much of his time he spends hiding and afraid. He hides himself from family and from whatever friends he has left, afraid that they will notice all the places where he has tried to stitch himself together; the places where the monster he is shows through. Things are really no different with Annabeth. He goes to her when he wants to hide from the world, retreating to her comforting and familiar touch that makes him feel whole like he used to and he leaves her when his mask comes too close to slipping off, the thought of her knowing who he has become driving him away from her how zeros retreated from Psyche. But perhaps what he has been busy hiding from the most is exactly what Piper is starting to say: that by retreating to Annabeth, he is hurting her in ways he’s too cowardly to even notice.

He stands suddenly, downing the rest of his lemonade and slamming the glass back onto the table. “Thanks for the lemonade, Honey!”

“You’re welcome, Mr. Jackson,” a voice called back from inside the house.

“Thanks for stopping by, Piper,” Percy says before beginning to walk away. When he says it, his voice is calm but detached. As if the person in front of him were any stranger off the street and not a friend of over ten years.

Though the truth is, she hasn’t been a friend to him in a long time. And even now, she is here as Annabeth’s friend, not his. Perhaps that is the source of this anger he’s feeling bubble up inside of him. Piper is not his friend, and never really has been if he’s being honest. Sure, they’ve shared a lot of experiences and Annabeth has brought them together at times, but in the quiet Cold War that settled between him and Jason, Piper had picked a side. And it hadn’t been his. Yet here she is, telling him to stay away from Annabeth as if she’s the goddess of love herself. _Aphrodite knows me better than you do,_ he thinks to himself.

“I’m sorry if this was hard to hear, Percy. I really am. But _someone_ has to look out for her.” Her tone has an edge to it that cuts Percy swiftly, like a piece of paper.

Percy turns on his heel and scoffs, incredulous at the idea that Piper can stand here on her high horse, pretending to care about him. “Spare me the righteousness, Piper. You’ve never really liked me, and there’s no one else around so you can drop the act.”

A look of hurt flashes across Piper’s face, but quickly shifts to anger. “So liking you means I have to pretend to be okay with this… teen angst bullshit of yours, even at the expense of my best friend?”

Percy feels something inside him recoil at her words. _My best friend_ . While he has never been the possessive type, something about the way the words curl off Piper’s tongue knock the wind out of him and leave him ready to fight. His face heats up as a feeling that must be jealousy begins to eat away at his insides. _Piper could never be her best friend_ , he thinks. _She will never understand Annabeth the way I do_. All he sees is red.   

“One quest and you think you've got it all figured out? You don’t know shit about what I’ve been through, okay? It’s not easy for me to just say forget it and move on.”

“You think it was easy for me, Percy? My list of dead friends might be shorter than yours but it still exists. None of this shit is easy but you can’t just sit in it all the damn time! I _worked_ at moving on, at getting some perspective.”  

Percy stands frozen, doing his best to push his anger back down. His real fight is not with Piper, but with himself. Even so, his pulse beats in his throat and his whole body feels warm.  

Piper sighs and continues. “Sometimes we can only get that from distance. That’s all I’m saying.”

Suddenly, he feels tired. The weight of Piper’s words crash down onto Percy’s shoulders, and thoughts of Atlas rush to his mind. The Titan has spent so long bearing his burden that nothing else mattered to him except passing it on to someone else. Atlas raged against an uncaring and unbothered sky, doing nothing but tormenting himself. Perhaps that self-torture is Atlas’s true burden. Percy doesn’t want it to be his.

_I never want to be like him,_ Percy thinks. Like Atlas, he carries something with him every day, but as Piper’s words reach his heart, Percy realizes he gets to decide how he bears that weight.

“Have a safe trip back to L. A., Piper,” he says, feeling unstuck. His voice has lost its edge and he hopes Piper can sense his deflation. Once again, he turns to walk away and he feels Piper watching him, though her feelings about the interaction will remain a mystery. He keeps his shoulders back and head held high, and does his best to push down the storm brewing inside of him. His mind swirls with Piper’s words, turning his thoughts into a whirlpool that would put Charybdis to shame.

_She’s waiting for you. You’re breaking her heart. Let her go._

_She’s waiting for you. You’re breaking her heart. Let her go._

_She’s waiting for you. You’re breaking her heart. Let her go._

_She’s w a i t i n g for y o u_

_She’s w a i t i n g for y o u_

_She’s w a i t i n g for y o u_

_You’re brea king her heart._

_You’re brea king her heart._

_You’re brea king her heart._

_Let her go._

_Let her go._

_Let her go._

_Let_

_her_

_go._

* * *

Percy paces up and down Annabeth’s block, the whirlpool of Piper’s words still swirling endlessly in his mind mixed with memories of Atlas holding up the sky. Blackjack had dropped him off an hour ago, and now here he was, completely unable to walk into the building and knock on Annabeth’s door. _So, what? I can only face her when I wanna hook up, is that really who I am now? Too much of a coward to just... Talk to her. She deserves better than that. She deserves better than me._ These thoughts are suddenly part of the unstoppable current that is dragging Percy under, but before he is completely lost to the tide the sound of familiar footsteps brings him back to the here and now. Looking up, he sees Annabeth walking towards him, her work heels clacking against the concrete. _My anchor,_ he thinks. Just the sight of her takes the breath out of his lungs, and suddenly the thoughts that were just threatening to drown him are calm and quiet.   

Finally she looks up and her eyes meet his, sending his heart into overdrive. _She’s waiting for you. You’re breaking her heart. Let her go._

Percy walks towards Annabeth in turn, the two of them meeting at the foot of the steps to her building.

“Percy, hey,” she says, tucking her hair behind her ear. She’s in a black pencil skirt and a gray blouse, meaning she’s probably just getting in from work. _Duh,_ Percy thinks. _She’s an actual adult, of course she was at work._

Percy swallows hard. “Hey... Uh, sorry to just show up like this.”

She shakes her head. “That’s okay.”

She fiddles nervously with her keys and their eyes stay locked.

Percy can feel the pressure that has built up between them over the last few years. He thinks back to all the lessons in school about tectonic plates shifting, having the power to move entire continents, reshaping the world just like that. It’s as if everything that has passed, all the quests, prophecies, monsters, and the aftermath, have created this pressure that stands between him and Annabeth, between them and a happy life. And Percy has been frozen in fear, doing his best to avoid setting it off because as suffocating as the pressure has been, he has never been able to bear the thought of a world beyond it. A world in which they are not simply divided by pressure, but completely separated by it. Right now, they are on the same continent. It is one of pain and loss, yes, but it has also known love. It has known loyalty. It has known, above all, friendship. And the idea of a new continent that is just his, one without her on it… it has been unthinkable. But his conversation with Piper was a fault line, and once it has been ruptured, there is no going back. Percy flashes back to the night he was claimed and he hears Chiron’s words from so long ago echo in his head. _Poseidon. Earthshaker, Stormbringer, Father of Horses._

And one in particular sticks in his mind _. Earthshaker_.

Percy takes a deep breath, and prepares to make the earth quake.

“Annabeth, I know the way things have been between us hasn’t been easy for you and I just- I really need you to know that if I thought I was hurting you more by coming around I would have left you alone. I’ve fucked up a lot of things in my life, but I would rather die than knowingly hurt you.”

“I know all of that.” Annabeth’s eyes scan Percy’s face, and he can see she’s desperate to understand what conversation they’re having. “Percy, where is this coming from?”

“Annabeth, I-”

_I love you_ is what he wants to say. Those are the words that are fighting to escape his throat, the words that desperately want to cross the threshold between unsaid and spoken. He wants to wrap her up in his arms and say the words that he’s been holding back for years now. What he wants more than anything is to shower her with those words that have always been there between them, even before either of them knew it (even when everyone else around them did).  He so badly wants to say them. But he can’t.

As many times as _I love you_ crosses his mind, _but_ crosses it more. That tiny word that has kept him behind a mask for his whole adult life. The word that keeps him from the woman he loves, and from a life that could maybe be his if only he reached out and grabbed it.  

_I love you, but I’m broken._

_I love you, but I’m scared._

_I love you, but you deserve so much more._

_But, but, but._

But he can’t. Or he won’t. Either answer ends the same: with him standing here, Annabeth standing there, the chasm of everything they could have been and everything they could have had keeping them apart with nothing to bridge the gap. Each of them alone, on their newly formed continents.

So instead of _I love you_ , he chokes out another set of words that burn as he says them.

“I’m leaving New York.”

He can almost feel the floor cracking beneath his feet as he waits, letting the words settle in for both of them. He feels them slam down like a guillotine, slicing in half whatever tethers might have still connected him to Annabeth. These words are a decision he hadn’t realized he made until he had said them out loud.

Leaving New York.

Percy Jackson is leaving New York.

The words leave an aftertaste on Percy’s tongue, something foreign and new. The kind of taste that leaves you confused, unsure if you like something or not.

“Oh,” Annabeth says finally, her eyes searching his like she’s looking for something she lost in the dark.

“I just, I think I need something new. For a while at least, ya know? I need some perspective, or something. Sometimes we can only get that from distance.”

The word _distance_ hangs in the air for a moment until it dissipates like smoke and they’re both able to take a breath.

“This is something you need to do?” she asks, lowering her gaze to the floor.

Percy shoves his hands into his pockets, his right fist closing around Riptide. “Yeah… I think it is.”

Annabeth crosses her arms and slowly raises her head up, and Percy mimics her movements. Their eyes meet, and for a split second Percy reconsiders everything.

Except it’s too late.

He sees Annabeth’s walls rise up, shutting him out perhaps for the last time. Her stance is rigid and her eyes are suddenly cold, as if she has locked every door that could possibly lead to her heart.

_Don’t let her see how much this is killing you._

Percy clears his throat and stands up straight. “So, I guess this is… goodbye.”

He watches as Annabeth’s jaw tightens and she swallows hard. “I guess so.”

Percy takes a tentative step towards her, and when she doesn’t move away, he closes the rest of the space between them.

Wrapping his arms around Annabeth has always felt natural to Percy, and this time is no different. She is tense, and then she isn’t. Slowly, she drops her arms and slowly wraps them around Percy’s middle, her hands resting on that spot that was really always hers. Annabeth moves her head into the crook of Percy’s neck and he places a slow, soft kiss to the side of her head. Closing his eyes, he breathes her in, committing her smell to memory. _God, I’m gonna miss you,_ he thinks.

Annabeth drops her hands from Percy’s back and he pulls away from her. Once again, they stand face to face, the short distance between them feeling like it may as well be the Grand Canyon.  

“See you later,” Percy says tentatively.

Annabeth chews on her lip, her eyes unfocused as if she is searching for the right words. She seems to find them and her eyes become clear as her gaze once again locks with Percy’s. Slowly, she reaches out for his hand, holding it tenderly like she’s scared it might break. Her thumb traces his knuckles as she takes a deep breath.

“You drool when you sleep,” she says back in a flat, almost shy tone.

The words hit Percy’s ears and their whole relationship flashes in his mind, from beginning to now. Every high, every low, and every moment in between. Annabeth has never been good with feelings or sentiment, but she has always shown Percy how she felt about him, even when he wasn’t looking. And once again here she stands, pouring her heart out to him in the most unconventional of ways, leaving Percy with one last gift that he isn’t owed.

Ending at their start.

Their eyes stay locked as his hand slips from hers and he whistles for Blackjack, who swoops down from the shadows swiftly. Percy climbs on to his magical companion and they fly into the night, the image of Annabeth in her work clothes under a streetlight stamped in his mind.

* * *

It’s after midnight and Percy sits at his mother’s dining room table holding a hot cup of tea in his hands.

“I’ve missed you, Little Boy Blue,” Sally says.

Percy smiles at the childhood nickname that his mother now uses sparsely. “I’ve missed you too, Ma. Sorry for not being around more.”

He keeps his head hanging, struggling to look her in the eyes for fear that one glance and she would know exactly how he’s been living. She reaches across the table and grabs his wrist, beginning to rub soothing circles with her thumb. He relaxes at her touch, reminded of all the times they had been in this position before. Just the two of them at this table, safe from anything outside their four walls.

“I know you are, Perce. I know that you’re doing your best.”

Percy winces as if she’s just struck him with that word. Is he actually doing his best? He can’t tell anymore.

He nods and speaks softly. “Are you sure we won’t wake Paul and Stelle?”

Sally smiles, moving her hand from Percy’s wrist to prop her chin up. “They’re not even here, so yes I’m sure. They’re on a father-daughter camping trip with Estelle’s girl scout troop.”

“Good… good,” Percy says, almost to himself.

Sally tilts her head at her son. “Something in particular on your mind?”

Percy stares into his tea, unsure of how to answer the question. The truth is, he doesn’t even remember how he ended up at his mom’s door. He remembers getting back to his apartment and sitting on the couch with a glass of whiskey, as his conversation with Annabeth played in his head. He had started to imagine what his life without Annabeth in it would look like, and the next thing he knew he was knocking on a door and before long his mom was standing there in a robe she’s had for too long, ushering him inside the apartment.

He pauses, trying to remember when he had started knocking on his mom’s door. How long has it been since he felt comfortable enough to simply… walk into his mom’s home; a home in which he had always been welcome. His brow furrows as he tries to pinpoint the moment, wading through the minefield of his memories to try and remember the origin of this new version of himself.

Sally sits patiently, letting several moments pass by in silence as she watches her son wage yet another internal battle. Percy looks up for a moment and notices his mom watching him, just patiently waiting for him to find his way out of the woods that are his thoughts. The corners of his mouth turn up slowly as Percy admires his mom, a woman who, when it comes to her son, is never in a hurry and never looking for a way out.

“Sorry,” he says shyly.

“That’s okay,” she says with a smile.

Percy looks down and then up again. “You’re something else, Sally Jackson, you know that?”

She winks playfully, “So I’ve heard.”

Percy balls his hands up and rests them on the table. “I’m serious, mom. You’re just…. You’ve always been my lighthouse. You don't know how lost I would be without you.”

Percy’s words surprise even him, but sitting with his mother has always been where Percy has felt the most vulnerable. She has always been his safe haven, and that is what he needs now more than anything. When he is here with her, the mask he wears every day fades away and he is just Percy. Her Little Boy Blue, with nothing to hide.

“No matter what, I can look up and… there you are. Waiting patiently for me to come home.”

Sally opens her mouth to speak, but no words come out so Percy continues.

“I wouldn’t be here without you, mom.” He finds it hard to look her in the eyes as he continues, taking her hands in his. “You are everything. Absolutely everything, and I swear on the River Styx that I’m gonna be the kind of man you can be proud of.”

Sally swallows hard as two tears race down her face and thunder claps in the distance. “Oh, Percy. From the very first moment I held you, not a second has gone by when you didn’t make me proud.”

The dam that has been holding back Percy’s tears begins to crack, and he feels a couple of droplets tracing their way down his cheeks.

“I’ve watched you save the world so many times, and I think that along the way you somehow got convinced that it wasn’t worth it to save yourself too. And I gotta tell ya, that just breaks my heart, Percy, because you are a good man.”

Percy nods, trying to stop the tears from falling.

“You’re a good man, Percy Jackson. Do you hear me?”

“Yes,” he says weakly.

Sally gets up from her chair and moves around the table until she is right next to Percy. He turns towards her and Sally puts her hands on either side of his face, holding him eye level with her.

“You’re a good man,” she says softly.

“I know,” Percy squeaks.  

“You are a good man,” she says more forcefully.

Percy nods and his shoulders begin to shake.

“Percy, I love you more than any and everything in this whole world. If you can trust anything, please trust that. And hear me when I tell you that you, my beautiful boy, who came into this world and forever made it a better place, with your big heart and bright smile, are _a good man_.”

Percy’s dam shatters to pieces.

\--

Being cradled in his mother’s arms as he sobs had not been in Percy’s plan for his day. But as his eyes flutter open, the morning light playfully beckoning him to wake, he feels how much he needed it. Percy breathes in time with the sounds of the city that seep in through his open window as a cool breeze washes over him. He groans as he stretches, and enjoys the thump of his body going limp against the mattress. Peaceful mornings have always been elusive for Percy, because waking up has meant crashing back into a harsh reality full of gods, monsters, prophecies, and loss. Today, though, it feels like it used to. Before he was accused of being a thief, before reaching sixteen against all odds, before the Doors of Death. Back when he was just a boy trying to be a good kid.

As if on queue, the smell of bacon catches Percy’s attention, and he pulls on a t-shirt to investigate. He reaches the kitchen where the table is already set for two, and Sally stands in front of the stove flipping what appears to be a pancake.

“Good morning, mom,” Percy chimes.

Sally turns, giving Percy a dazzling smile that makes his heart swell. “Good morning, kiddo. Pancakes okay?”

“Pancakes are perfect, thank you. Can I help?”

“Absolutely not! Just sit there and look pretty,” she says with a wink.

Percy laughs despite himself. “You’re such a mom.”

“And don’t you forget it, mister.”

The rest of the morning is picturesque. Mother and son share breakfast, and talk the morning away. Percy gushes about his students at camp, especially Letha who has been an unexpected joy in his life.

“You’d love her, mom. She’s just like-“ The word gets caught in his throat.

“Just like Annabeth?” Sally asks tentatively.

Percy nods. “Yeah. Annabeth.”

“How is she doing, anyway?” she asks, taking a sip of her coffee.

Percy takes a deep breath and tells his mom about their conversation the night before. Once again, Sally sits patiently as Percy recounts Piper’s visit and his ensuing spiral. She nods along, gives solitary mhmms where appropriate. When Percy is done, she takes a long sip of her coffee and places the cup back on the table gingerly. Percy desperately searches her face for a reaction, his eyes tracing the lines of her face hoping they will give some indication of how she’s feeling. _Hurting the two women you love most in twenty four hours. Nice, Jackson. Real nice_ , he thinks to himself, anticipating the worst.

“Well…” Sally begins as Percy’s shoulders tense. “If that’s what you need to do to heal, then I support you one hundred percent.”

Percy instantly relaxes. “Really?”

“Of course, sweetheart. As much as it pains me sometimes, you’re... all grown up! Getting away might give you the time you need to really think about what you want.”

Percy takes a sip of his own coffee, letting the physical warmth chase and build onto the emotional warmth that is overtaking him.

“What did Annabeth say?” Sally asks.

“Not much,” Percy says, eyes downcast. “But we haven’t exactly been in a place to have long, emotional talks.”

“I see… Well hopefully the distance helps her too,” Sally says with a shrug.

“Mom, while I’m gone will you, uh..”

“Keep an eye on her for you?” Sally asks, her eyebrows raised.

Percy blushes and tries to hide his face. “Yeah. I know it sounds dumb since I’m the one leaving I just-”

“Love her.”

It’s not a question, and she doesn’t say it like one. Percy again meets his mother’s gaze. “Yes. And I just need to make sure she’s okay, you know? That she’ll _be_ okay.”

Sally smiles into her coffee. “I love Annabeth too, so don’t you worry. I’ll be in her life for as long as she’ll have me in it.”

Percy nods. “Good.”

“So when do you leave?”

Percy shrugs. “As soon as possible I guess. There’s a few things at camp I need to finish up and then I suppose I’m free to go.”

“Well the first step is done,” Sally says.

“What do you mean?” Percy asks.

“Aren’t the Greeks all about getting a mother’s blessing before embarking on some new adventure?”

Percy laughs. “Yeah, I guess they are.”

“Well then,” Sally says, raising her coffee cup. “Cheers to blessings and new adventures?”

Percy takes a deep breath, his mind racing with all of the possibilities for the life that lies ahead of him. A new world he has shaken into existence. Leaving New York has always sounded like such an impossibility to Percy, like something that he would only do if he were forced. But here, at his mother’s kitchen table, the beautiful expanse of unexplored places unfolds in his mind. He has defended this city countless times. He has won a war across its grid, fallen in love on its streets, grown up in its heart. Maybe getting away is his chance to find peace, to find a way back to himself and ultimately come back to the city and feel at home again. Maybe even a chance to find hope again. All of these thoughts race through Percy’s mind and he raises his coffee mug to meet his mom’s.

“Cheers to New York.”  


**Author's Note:**

> major shout out to Hannah who always encourages me and assures me that I'm not as bad at this writing thing as I think I am sometimes. Truly my angel.
> 
> experimented a tiny bit with formatting in this one which was a good time, and honestly it's fun to just get in your feelings and write your favorite character going through some shit... I hope you enjoyed reading it!


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